Dear Darlings,

Today was Claire’s last first day of high school. This is the first of many lasts for her, Stan and me. I know we’ve sent two off into the great, wide world, but this is the last of the lasts for me. The final one. I knew it wouldn’t get easier with each one. I was right. But today, I kept it together. For her. And me.

So many things are being thrown at me from so many different directions. We paid senior fees the other day, including her parking pass in the senior lot. The senior lot! She’s a flipping senior in high school now!

Top that off with her portrait package coming in the mail over the weekend. She was all dressed up in her drape for the yearbook photo and then in her cap and gown. It’s almost too much for this mama…all of these things at once.

I know I’m overly sentimental. But I come by it honestly, and I’m not going to apologize for it. I’ve come to accept the fact that this is who I am. I wear my heart on my sleeve when it comes to my kiddos…but hey…I’m okay with that.

So in the spirit of my over-sentimentality this is who I imagined going off to school today…This sweet, extremely tall kindergartner. The excited smile says it all. She was ready to head off to school.

In reality, this is who I sent off to school today…

A remake of the original.

These three started kindergarten together.

This extremely sweet, not so overly tall senior in high school. The excited smile says it all. She’s ready for all of these last of the firsts. I’m beyond proud of her and over-the-moon thrilled for all that the world holds in store for her.

But before all of these last of the firsts photos, she and I woke up before the crack of dawn to work out. We were walking side-by-side into the gym, and I thought to myself, “how am I going to handle the thought of her going away next year?” My heart answered with, “I’m going to enjoy every precious minute I get to have with her!”

As she was heading off to school, I snuck outside to take my final pictures of the morning…or at least I thought I snuck outside, but she saw me and said, “Mom, do you think I don’t know what you’re doing,” with an with an ear-to-ear grin on her beautiful face. I responded with, “I’m dressed all in black so I thought I’d blend in…” When she pulled away for her last first day of high school, she leaned over in the car and gave me that one last, little wave good-bye. My heart burst with happiness, and a few tears, but I’m gonna concentrate on the happiness. And every minute I get to have with this amazing young woman who calls me mom. 

Oh, for the love of my children…

xo,

me