YAY!!  Yesterday was the day my expander finally came off.  It was on exactly eight months, 13 days, and 1 hour…not that I was counting, or anything! 

January 21 was the day I got my braces and expander on and right after they were put on I met two of my friends for lunch.  It was no easy feat eating with those suckers on for the first time.  And then, that night Stan and I had a wine dinner…what the heck was I thinking??  Lunch and then a wine dinner with brand new hardware all up in my mouth!  That was crazy.  I remember sitting at lunch thinking how the heck I was going to choke down french onion soup.  The strands of cheese and onion kept wrapping around my expander.  It was a painful ordeal.  By the 7 o’clock when it was time to leave for the wine dinner it felt like someone had taken a cheese grater to the inside of my cheeks.  There was not much dinner consumed by me, but a fair amount of wine ~ trying to ease the pain. 

Yesterday, as I was leaving for my ortho appointment Stan asked if I was absolutely sure I was getting my expander off…well, that put a damper on my spirits.  What if I was wrong?  What if it really wasn’t expander off day??  Could I be tortured for one more month with this damn expander getting in the way??  DAMN!  Now, I wasn’t so sure….

My fears were eased as soon as I walked into Dr. White’s office and was greeted with “I am so excited for you!”  “It’s a big day!”  WHEW!!  I was seated and the work began. 

As I heard the expander cracking and popping off of my teeth I got whiff of an odor so powerful and nasty I almost started to gag.  The smell wafting out of my mouth as the expander was pulled off was something I never want to experience again…it was horrendous.  Months of rotting food trapped on the inside of the expander caused noxious fumes to come spewing out of my mouth.  I was fastidious about keeping everything clean.  I waterpiked at least once a day.  My nighttime routine cleaning my mouth takes about 20 minutes but nothing can keep the food out of the expander.  My ortho tech said my mouth looked better than most she’s seen.  I don’t think I will ever forget that smell but I sure hope I never have to experience it again!

I went right from Dr. White’s office to lunch with some friends.  My first meal post expander.  It was almost as interesting as my first meal with the expander on.  I have to relearn how to eat and chew but I truly am OK with that!  The damn expander is gone and I am feeling good. 

I can check getting an expander off my bucket list.  Been there done that and have no desire to go back! 

Claire is next on the list for an expander.  Oh, dear!  I don’t envy her but at least I can sympathize and we can have a really big celebration when it comes off!

Oh, for the love of my children…